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Christmas Chopin. What do you learn at Santa's Helpers school The elf-a-bet Why does Santa go to strip clubs? To visit all the ho ho ho's. What do you call a can that has the Christmas spirit?Because he only comes once a year Where does santa keep his money? a snow bank. What do you call the wrapping paper leftover from opening presents? a christ-MESS I think Christmas is near! Because i see a ho!They both have ornamental balls. What does one ho plus two ho make? Answer, a jolly Santa Who doesn't eat on Christmas? A turkey because it is always stuffed. Why did Santa send his daughter to college?Claustrophobic. What do the elves cook with sex addiction men Fuck friends in the kitchen? Utinsel. What does Santa bring naughty boys and girls on Christmas Eve? A pack of batteries with a note saying "toy not included". What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa?A Merry can. Why did Santa divorce Mrs. Claus? because she was a ho ho ho. What does Christmas and weirdo's have in comman? Fruitcake. What does "The Grinch" do with a baseball bat? Hit a gnome and run.Why are Christmas trees better than Men? Even the small ones give satisfaction What do you call a sheep who doesn't like Christmas? Baaaaaaaa humbug. Why was Santa's little helper depressed? Because he had low elf esteem.The flalalalalalalala days Who delivers Christmas presents to dogs? Santa paws! What cars do elfs drive? a toy yota. Who delivers Christmas presents to cats? Santa claws! Why does santa have three gardens? so he can ho ho ho What do you call buying a.Mary christmas and a Abby new year. Knock Knock Who's there? Tissue. Tissue Who? All I Want For Christmas Tissue. The 4 stages of life: 1. You believe in Santa Claus 2. You don't believe in Santa Claus 3.