Her sister smiled and said, Thats nothing, mine is already eating bananas. How does a woman scare a gynecologist? By becoming a ventriloquist! A woman places an ad in the local newspaper. Looking for a man with three qualifications: wont beat me up, wont run.
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He walks straight up to the Madam, drops down 500 and says, I want your ugliest woman and a grilled cheese sandwich! The Madam is astonished. But sir, for that kind of money you could have one of my prettiest ladies and a three-course meal.
What took you so long to answer? he asked. I was in bed, she replied. What were you doing in bed this late? Getting a second opinion. Unexpected sex thats a great way to wake up.
I sent her a bottle of the most expensive wine on the menu. She sent me a note, I will not touch a drop of this wine unless you can assure me that you have seven inches in your pocket.
The trucker replies, Listen darlin, Im not horny Im just homesick. What do you call 2 guys fighting over a slut? Tug-of-whore. I was sitting on my own in a restaurant, when I saw a beautiful woman at another table.
If you dont want to have sex, pull on my dick one hundred times. What does it mean when your boyfriend is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name? You didnt hold the pillow down long enough.
And hands the other a 10 inch long BIC lighter Surprised the guy asks Where did you get this? The guy replies Oh I have a personal genie. The first man asks Can I make a wish?
Mommy please make me a sandwitch Dont call me mommy just because I slept with your father! So how I supose to call you? Like everybody Steven. Why cant you play Uno with a Mexican?